Tuesday, September 28, 2004
about: my life
2 long days have past... sch, wat else...
its my 2nd home...
i think i;m spending equal amt at my 2 homes, or rather even more time in sch...
no matter how tired i may get... how demoralising, how tough, how unfun it is, i got to perserve... i only haf effectively 2 weeks more in ACJC... as a formal student... i dun wan to do anything tat will make me regret my actions in e future...
yea...
read few pple's blogs, as in links from my friend's friends... and i know i shldnt... as in not tat its an offence or invading into privacy, but rather, i read stuff tat i dun wan to know abt... i rather b kept in e dark... after reading, i'm juz speechless... emotions r flowing, but yet emotionless...
Sunday, September 26, 2004
about: my life
Food for Thots
Action speaks louder than words..
Wats e use of saying so much, when at e end of e day 1 dun do wat 1 peaches?
instead of making e sitution better.. sometimes it becomes worst..
tat goes for promises too.. e word "always" & "never" shld not b in e dictionary.. cause nth last enternally in e human world... so y use it or take it too seriously now.. not easy though..
when promises r made, words r said, yet are not performed in e end.. isnt it so tat disappointment is all tat 1 will get..
are really promises meant to b broken? Why then?
Like a knife stabbed into e heart..
its hurts.. wanting so much to scream out so much, hoping tat e pain will go, someone will help mend e wound.. yet it hurts so much tat u dunno how to or cant even scream.. and knowing tat e more u scream for help, u juz burden another person and e worst e pain will juz get.. so scream for wat? but bottling up alone isn’t good too.. now, this kind of situation.. do this not right, do tat not right.. then how?
My ans is, I dunno.. if only I knew..
if only a cure would b made..
if only it was all a nightmare, or even suffer from partial memory loss..
but personally i haf "bad" memory.. as in, bad stuff i chose to lock it in a small part of my memory.. memories good & bad r still memories... quoted from someone.. if u think its u then its u..
experiences we encounter r good opportunties to grow, to learn, to mature oneself... esp e bad ones.. it depends on individual whether or not u want to look at a situation negatively, or look at things from a brighter more positive light.. y make oneself feel horrible.. not like as if its gonna help much..
i'm trying.. not easy, but worth e try..
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
about: my life
Blogged on 22 sept 2004... time 11.15pm..
havent been hafing or rather wanting to say much or speak much lately and of e past few days..
sch been as fun as ever though.. even after all e interesting grades, e class still haf time for laughter & chill out time.. but e class as a whole, can see is more serious than usual.. prelims results were moderated and things r looking brighter for me.. so I got to preserve on..
no.1 light of e day
A phone call made a whole lot of a difference.. I became high, seems like I did tok a whole lot of rubbish.. laughed quite a bit.. its been quite some time since I felt this way.. relaxed.. happy.. simple yet beautiful..
no. 2 light of e day..
behind every laugher and smile lies tears and sorrow.. hmmm... juz suddenly thot of this quote... contributed by mitchell
From Friday experience, I shant go into details.. only 2 persons know abt e happenings of me.. its getting better.. faith, will be strong & continue to rely on Him, for I know He has a plan for me.. yea, I came to realize, not tat I nv realize b4, tat there r pple who care, who really care.. guess its juz me thinking too much.. girls mah.. appreciate lotz.. wat more can I ask for rite? (,”)
Blogger on 17th sept 2004:
17th Sept 2004 (Fri), is THE day.. exactly one month after e start of my prelims..
time flies, before I know it, another month past.. tat will b 17th Oct.. say, 8days to As Phy Pract? Then another month 17th Nov.. say As Econs paper 3? Then another month 17th Dec.. play time, prepare for Christmas..
Ladies and Gentlemen, we are at the final stretch of this Singapore Formal Education Marathon.. a distance of 10 yrs, 120mths, 480weeks.. now, we’ll down to reaching e finishing line.. e post prelims, pre As period.. e last lap.. its not gonna b easy..
Before e release of results at 2.30, my class, as crappy as ever, plan.. hmmm jump down.. ever wonder why e sch allocated e top floor to e SG combi.. juz nice to jump down, its e easy & fastest way down.. My class 7.11.. e windows wide enough, view downwards & across really cool..
After release.. we said out goodbyes to Mr How.. WE asking him to chill, to relax.. ironic isn’t it.. shldnt we b telling him tat instead? Its us taking e As at e end of this yr, not him.. after he left.. siwei went “guys, cool down!” he was holding e fire water hose from outside.. either Shao or rehan actually turned on the water.. using Jason crutches.. ‘u hit me, I hit u’.. dun worry, no one got hurt.. other crappy stuff too..
My class.. 2SG4.. fun huh?
5days of term 4 has gone by.. quite alright.. been going thr e prelims papers.. learnt few exams skills, as in how to actually ans e qn properly.. in As, knowing e facts isn’t enough, its how to present, how to know wat to write for e marks.. every single marks counts..
Sun.. went furniture fair with dad & mum.. e music speaker was playing this theme song sung by Step Sun, I think.. from “turn right, turn left”.. a movie, despite me hafing e vcd still on my table, I haven’t watched it.. for some reasons.. L
then off to Botanical Gardens.. some Thomas Jazz club was holding a performance there.. this dance sch “jittlebug” too.. cool cool cool.. I observed ard me.. quite a few Chinese wife, Ang Moh husband.. Ang Moh familes.. e kids juz so cute.. running n dancing ard.. these high class familes lied their mats, mini table, bottle of wines, wine glasses.. some others with chips, food, drinks.. in e mids of enjoying e wonderful, smoothen jazz music, clean & green environment.. there were Singaporeans too, not necessarily e majority.. I would love to go back there again, along with a dog.. saw few dogs on e way.. a few really cute ones.. is not often I get attracted to dogs.. I dun like not those stray dogs..
then off for dinner.. Greek resturant.. as stated by tat place, it’s supposively e only greek resturant in town.. “in town” does it mean in Singapore, which is highly possible.. or in town as in in town (orchard, central) hmmm.. anyway e food was good good good.. yum yum.. I love e starters e most.. it’s a must try, must eat.. Ok, I like trying different kinds of food, unique food, from e various corners of e world.. so do I eat to live, or eat to live… well, I live to eat good food..
Saturday, September 11, 2004
about: my life
finally get to blog... using my sis laptop... yea... i'm gonna reformat my com...
wed, thurs out... 10am to 8pm... long day... i got to eat my mac breakfast... like finally... yuppies... haha... had so much fun, although once in a while kanna bullied... but its ok lar... as long as everyone is happy, relaxed, i am too... its juz great and satisfying to b able to put a smile on others face...
and mitchell, stop thinking so much, ask so much weird questions... this girl ah, juz out of e blue, each time she pose a question, my heart juz pump so fast u know... questions like "would u treasure a person u woo more, or someone who woo u first", "would u risk a friendship for relationship"... i agree, its case by case basis...
thur almost stayed over at airport, with mitchell, my kor & jy... but in e end we, as in me and mit didnt... i wanted so much to... but anyhow, e 2 guys stayed over... i woke up from my slp at 5plus in e early fri morning, sms then had a chat with them over e phone... then went back to slp again... haha...
fri, stayed home, catch up with my slp and tv... relax relax... soon its gonna b back to mugging time... haha...
today, went to church for some event "Peranakan Cultural Night"... by my church (PMC) and PLMC... they invited from Pasir Ris community & St Luck's Homes... its really cool to see so many old folks in their traditional clothes, performing, singing songs, and be part of e culture... part of MY culture... but too bad, according to dad and many, this peranakan cultural is dying off in spore.... Katong is supposively suppose to b a Pernakan area... want good food, laska, kueh, sambal chilli? go Katong... one of my favourite places... yea
my generation is indeed becoming so modern... we know so little abt e culture, e language, e roots, our anscentors... at least i not tat bad leh... i know some traditional stuff here and there, haf e attire, know how to make some kueh, once in a while hang ard with my aunties, uncles, or even grand aunties, uncles... hehe...
i'm proud to be a Peranakan ger... yuppies...
then off to Bugis with family & mum's side sis & family... had bubble tea... e place where my auntie first recommanded me to bubble tea many years ago even before "HAPPY CUP", "MOMO TEA" came out... at least this tea house is still surviving unlike e rest... hmmm
dad bought Inter-Continental Hotel cakes... yum yum... i've been carving for chocolate cakes...
then its shopping time... i juz love it.. shopping with dad & mum... ATM... haha
oh ya, abt tat stupid prank fellow... he has juz stepped on my toes this afternoon... but no fear, i had someone to protect me... once i find out who, tat's it for him...
hmm something i've been thinking abt... read wz blog... it tragged my mind... during e 3 weeks of olympics, not much world news... as in those destructives ones like war, terrorism... so much for saying tat e olympics committee spend tons of money on security and deference... but after olympics over, like now... so much in e world happening... Russia... Indonesia... y ah? hmmm it cant b because e media been too busy with olympics then, tat they neglect world issues few weeks back rite? hmmm...
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
about: my life
today received a prank call... no, its a few...
well, for abt a week ago liao... tat fellow been saying stupid things, keeping his identity unknown... said something tat really pissed me off today... he smsed me, pretending to be my dad... dun go too far, once u step over THE line... tat's it... cos previously i kept rejecting e call... i see e number until can recognise liao... i got so pissed, i called my friend to check him out.. help me scold whoever tat irritant is... i didnt know how to react, didnt know wat to do next... i dun wan to scold tat fellow directly... called my friend... he picked up e phone, then went "wat u want!"... wow, i tell u, i was shocked... juz shocked... how else wld i react to such a greeting... but i know he did it 4 e fun of it lar... tat's him...
in e end, didnt manage to connect tat fellow... wat's tat fellow up to man... he quite smart i must say...
went out for lunch with dad... came home, still feeling sucky, couldnt get over wat happened ine morning... i juz went to slp... or rather forced myself to slp... i dun wan to think abt anything, i juz want everything to disappear when i wake up... but obviously, it wasnt e case...
i cried... good thing i was home alone then...
sent a few sms, no reply... e feeling i get from unanswered smses is juz *yuck!* i juz hate it when i get no sms... juz couldnt make myself concentrate on anything else... but wat can i do rite... yea...
but well, faith u will b fine...
Monday, September 06, 2004
about: my life
today been great... simple, yet good.... had e 2 best company ever... was hyper and had lots of fun laughing, daydreaming and stuff... haha
yea, mitchell is a great thinker man... well at least e stuff she thinks abt, tat goes thr her head r things i will nv haf thot of... she made few interesting observation.... post me a few qn tat caught me thinking... an eg, out of nowhere, pop up ask me, gave me a shock man, "
How important am i to you"... wow, on top of my shockness from daydreaming, how to answer shld a qn... "
Do u still like as much as u did before".... blah blah blah...
we talked abt GAY... a little abt les too... hehe... hmmm.... next time to see if a guy is gay, see which hand he uses to shake hands... which hand he raised as a sign of agreement... if its LEFT hand, then he may, juz MAY b a gay... haha... i did a little experiment, hmm ok, jy isnt gay... wonder r his friends ard him gay, cos when they together, they do add like one... haha
i was also asked, "Why i all of e sudden like e sitcom FRIENDS?"... after a while of thinking, i finally think i know y... cos things tat u like, u often talk abt, some how or another i will slower haf interest in it too... its weird rite? but its so... hehe... yea... but FRIENDS today was cool...
Sunday, September 05, 2004
about: my life
Pictures speaks a thousand words...
i decided, or rather haf started uploading pictures onto another blog...
knowing tat my internet connection is only 56k.. how pathetic is tat... dl-ing pics is super long... but thanks to this blog, hello, picasa, its so much faster this way....
so a few pictures will b up each time i blog...
e main purpose of this, is to share my mission photos with everyone... so, i'll b starting on tat....
yea...
today, helped sis bake brownies for her cf supper talk in sch...
e instruction for e temperature of e oven was in 'F', but i nv learn this unit leh... hmm its not a SI unit... i only know 'C' n 'k'... so i had to figure out how to convert correctly... found out it has a fomular to e convertion... off hand cant remember now... will update again later...
but guess, i estimated e temp wrongly, so set e oven temp wrongly, too high... guess wat... burnt... so top layer of my brownies had to b cut off.... even so, i tried it, its still as nice... yum yum... but of course, i made it... haha...
was reading LIME mag, abt LDR... e part tat struck me e most was how to maintain a good relationship... TRUST, is THE word.... not only does this apply to LDR, but also to SDR too... TRUST, is THE word... something not easy to handle, but its e key...
read another email, which was on trust too...
some main points abt e article...
-- NO POINTING FINGERS... dun blame everthing on e other person... realise tat u haf a part to play too... if u expect pple to forgive & understand u, forgive & understand them first...
-- NO OVERPOWERING... dun demand & expect too much... for a leapard will nv change its spot... accept tat...
-- RIGHT SPEECH... e way one phrase, e words used, e tone, attitude, context used in.. all these plays a part and makes a difference
-- PERSONAL PERCEPTION... dun bother too much on wat others think... do wat u think is right for e situtaion...
-- BE PATIENT... Love one and not two... if u judge someone, u haf no time to Love them...
hmmm, i learnt something new today... not easy but something tat we will pay more attention to... No one is perfect....
Saturday, September 04, 2004
about: my life
today been quite a resourceful day...
woke up earlier than usual, but later than when there's sch...
went market with mum...
had breakfast... my wantan noodles stall closed... guess they went on a holiday... they deserve it... after working so hard...
for e 1st time, after so long.. maybe as long as a year or two, i stepped into e market once again... hmmm i haf to say, e place changed... changed for e better... e wet market isnt so wet anymore... e raw food are stored and displayed with greater hygiene and class... as mum walked ard to get her stuff, e good thing abt marketing with her is tat i got to decide wat i wanted to eat... veri rare would mum buy sotong back... but this time she did... cos i requsted... its look quite cool then... haha... saw how e fish monger clear e interestine and other stuff in e fishes... yuck!... mum was telling me, tat was one of e advantages of buying food from market... its fresher, and will save her a lot of trouble of washing e unwanted part off at home... not only for fish, but chicken, pork too... however, vegetable is considered ex... precisely cos e prices of e vegetable are not stated... e stall owner tend to overcharge... buy from PRIME supermarket better... more variey somemore... i noticed something else... these stall owners are quite generous with e use of plastic bags... hmm wonder wonder... wat can b done to help save e environment and use less plastic... i suggested to mum, bring own tupperwear, containers... but apparently its seem quite troublesome and bucky though... hmmm.... e food not light leh... i helped my mum carry e stuff while she chose her vegetables.. she was telling me, if not for me, imagine her, one hand holding all e heavy food, e other hand picking her vegetable... wow, it must haf been tough on u, mum... all these years... u been unfailing doing all these chores for e family... not easy, not relaxing i must say, esp after my hands on today... thanks mum, love ya so much... and she jus had to add, "next time ur turn"... oh no oh no... hmm we'll see how all these marketing system and society will b like then then... haha...
came home, tried to start on my work again, after such a long break... but guess wat, i juz kept falling aslp...
had bowling with church ym... first time stay in e bowling allay so long... wow... but i had fun.. initially i was a little reluntent in going... but i got reminded... hey, i'm from evangi team... i shld b doing my job... moreover cheryl cant go due to work.. e more they need me there... wow, say until i how impt... haha... had fun with mit, vivien and gang... i went crazy as usual... it all started when i saw this really huge (i really mean huge, say 2 times of my ht and width) inflated Garfield at e cinema... ended up really tired at e end of e day, like now...
Friday, September 03, 2004
about: my life
Been feeling kind of crappy lately... keep blogging complains... tat's my way of expressing my thots i guess... trying as hard as possible not to burden any1 else... but if really no choice, then no choice lor... but i got to maintain my tai tai imagine... *pushing my specs up*... haha
tai tai talk:
"No fresh chicken... No egg... No fish... haiyo... price go up.. so ex...
curry puff no egg, nasi lemak no egg, ban mian no egg... wat is this.. cheat my money only... i wan to complain..."
"i boiled soup... good for curing heatiness... esp for students study so hard, slp so late.. drink more drink more.. good for ur health"
"light not bright enough, bad for eyesight.. haiyo"
"remember every 30 mins of studying, must rest ur eyes for 5 mins.. look at some greeny... must remember ah"
have i been watching too much tv? hehe... channel8 7pm is a tai tai show... hmmm...
about: my life
I am juz bored to death now… yes, I still haf my As to study for… I will still accompany my books…. but I’m juz bored lar… life so boring.. come on, I juz need something to help liven everything up, liven me up… ever since e end of my prelims… I’m like a dead person.. not tat I nv do anything, I did lar… in fact, quite a bit… enough to keep my day going, juz a little slower… but….. I dunno lar!!!
Went out shopping at orchard with class on thur… to get teachers day present… I hardly even spoke much… tat’s not me… but I juz felt so sian…
to think how fun it was when I walked, or rather was made to walk, from say suntec all e way to forum…. one end to e other… I can juz crap and crap and laugh abt and jump about and whine and complain and do anything funny sort of thing… how cool is tat man…
anyway we got for …
Mr How… a SNAKE… RED SNAKE… so cute lar, e soft toy… I also want…. Anyway, tat’s out of point…. he so tou lan… so slack… then once told us abt this pyrant story… ok, however u spell tat word… so lame
Madam Malini… a CARDIGAN… right from e start, I choose white liao… so classy, so nice… but those guys wanted dark purple… so after a bit of “argument”, e gers won… gers rulez… come on, u guys can trust our taste… WHITE… e price range of cardigan from different places, brands, quality of material varied so much man
Mrs Chan… e never say die teacher… we initially wanted to get her batteries, but we thot, may b quite insulting… so change…. In e end got for her this toy tat works on solar… hmm physics physics… its suppose to haf a relax effect… juz nice for her… she needs to relax…
Mr Sun… this one, we e most slip-shot with… who ask him also so slip-shot with us… he keep tokking abt his city havest… so juz bought him some house decoration wood thingie from a Christian store…
Miss Koh... next door ct… see how nice 2SG4 can get… not out tutor we also got her a gift… awww… bet she veri touched…
At e end of e day, we were underbudget… not bad sia…. Got extra money for e end of year party fund…
Oh ya I must add… seeing Jason and siwei carrying all e stuff while walking ard…they like some typical bf/ hubby… go shopping with gf/wife… ok, now only short of the handbag…. Hmmm…. haha
Friday… Teachers’ Day Celebration… on e way up e spirial stairs… student councilors were giving out sweets… twinkle stars sweets… awww, one of e sweets I used to love when I was young…hey, I’m still young… its been a while since I last ate one though… entered e hall… wow! Stars…. Quite beautiful I must say… so e concert… quite cool… and as usual, had to b a giraffe… being seated right at e back of e hall… Wesley was teaching peggy and me how to fold paper aeroplanes… His areoplane is really cool… its different from e normal ones… or well, maybe I nv seen b4… but wonder if can really fly… I dunno… didn’t dare to try… although many others did… e mooncake order form ended up as paper areoplanes…. Pls lar, those mooncake, from hongkong… dun bother eating them… no quality at all… yuck! Yes, its cheap, maybe tat can explain it all… in this realistic and economical world, nothing comes free… u got to pay for e quality… like they say, there’s no free lunch in e world… I’ll save e econs concepts… haha
Anyway, I completed my Purpose Driven Life book liao… yuppies… a book tat went thr a lot with me… esp during each down and helpless period…
HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY
Wednesday, September 01, 2004
about: my life
I’m super pissed now... not with any1 or anything...
Juz so irritated...
I think my com kanna virus, do everything also take so long... lag until cannot lag... my blog blank (at this point of time)... .
Away from my com...
LIfe is abt waiting and being patience...
sometimes waiting for some stuff tat one is still unsure if it would happen one day, one fine day...
by human nature, we will still unknowingly wait, take this risk, risk of hurting and disappointing urself and even others greatly at e end of e day... but is it worth it? its for no one to say... up to e individual to decide...
Life juz full of all these rite? this is wat makes life exciting, like a rollar coster ride isnt it? hmmm
Juz now my kor called me.. guess he needed a listening ear... yup, so I let him talk, I listen... didn’t really know how to react, response... I tried to lighten up e mood, toked s.ome rubbish, voiced my opinion and stuff, toked abt serious stuff... yup, hope I did help, did make a difference... not by my mere strength but God using me to minister to him...
Yup, tat is my genius kor... now, his buddy...
Knowing e pain u r going thr... emotionally and physically... When I first heard of e news of ur poor attandance aka MIA n related stuff thingie... worried and down I was... not tat I knew wat to do, e correct things to say, I only can constantly keep u in my prayers... believing tat God made all that happening to you for a purpose... believing tat someday I will, u will understand y it even happened... cause He has never failed me, disappointed me... He wont disappoint u too... at least, I can see a ray of hope now...
God will make a way, when there seems to b no ways... remember tat always...
Then ur chest pain came... each time u go "arh! pain!", this little heart goes "arh!" too... dunno how to express how i feel now... will tears do e job? y is all these happening? ... making sure u eat ur pills, knowing tat u dun like it and think its of no use... pls take care...
Ps. Its pass midnight now... yup, its my emotional state of mind time... tat explains all my crappness... actually its not crap...
